I am strong

some nights, like tonight,

when I want to crawl

out of my skin from

the leeching pain 

of withdrawal from what

was once pain relief, 

I see a post on heroin

overdose and death -

and think:

opiate withdrawal is hell. 

it really is.

but I have to remind

myself that I am strong. 

so damn strong. 

like you don't know

how damn strong I am.

there might be tears

welling up and running down

my cheeks as I breathe in and 

out in an attempt to fight

the waves of pain keeping 

me awake, but I am strong. 

I will smile and go to work

and make it seem like 

nothing is wrong. and fight

to live. to breathe. free

from this rewiring of

my brain and body. 

I am strong. 

© eleanor clark

22 March, 2016